The Cat in the HAT

I've been really busy trying to catch up at work after the monumental storms that hit us. Every night I turn around and look at the clock only too see its again midnight...and I still need to wash my hair. Needles to say I've been dead tired...and also my eyesight that was bad its getting even worst.

So I leave work later and pick up the little guy, I get home and open the door and I see Pearl (our cat) jumping of the couch and running for dear life. I call her...

Me: pearl, pearl, what happen baaaby (insert baby talk here) c'mom you fat girl, come to mama, whats wrong? booo boo gagagaga {ok kidding there}


me again: peeeeaaarllll, come heereee. why are you hiding...

silence

then grunt

follow by soft meowwwwwww

I call again...Pearlll...c'mon...

By this time I have the baby on the bed and I'm taking his coat off...then
SWISSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
cat jumps on bed all happy and meowing even more...only IT WAS NOT PEARL!
ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK


me: sho, sho, sho...who the hell are you (oy, that sounded like rap, carry on)


meow, meao meow.

GET OFFcat runs out of the bedroom but lays on kitchen floor. Pearl is no where to be found.

I dial the Maintenance in our building. Phone is disconnected (WTF?!) did I mention that.we.just.move?


call hubs: there is a cat in the house and is not ours.


hubs: what.da.ya.mean a cat?


me: four legged creature, small, furry, long tail, usually kills mice.


hubs: funny. what are you talking about?


me: there is a cat here and I am locked in the bedroom. I'm calling Cust. Service. Bye (I'm not afraid, I'm an animal lover darn it, but I have a 9 mo baby and a senior cat and I don't know where this cat came from or if its sick, has feline AIDS, fleas or rabies)

Instead I call the Sis first, cause really...I have too.

Repeat conversation above. Sister laughs at our luck. In our last place we had a mama Squirrel and her two babies under our sink, they got there...thru the AC VENT! Anyways I am wondering if someone was here...

Sister: yeah, maybe someone let him in

Me: what if they are still in here?

Sis: what?!

me: let me check if there is a killer here, if you hear me scream call 911

sis: uhm...you're crazy

me: (open door, close door, check bathtub, baby's room closet,etc) nope, not here, let me see here ...OUCH...I'm ok just slam the door on my finger...uhm..nope, no one under the bed...ok we're good.

Sis: ok, then..

we hang up.

So I call Customer Service...not business hours...leave message.

Beep: yeah, this is Patricia from blah blah blabiddy, there is a cat inside our place, all our windows and doors where closed. I'm guessing someone was here and let him in. I want the locks change IMMEDIATELY. hang up.



I grab baby on one arm, use my fake baby voice and manage to make the cat go outside...so out his stays in the hallway. I don't care. Cat meows incessantly for 5 minutes. then silence.

A little later is time to pick the hubs from the train station. By this time Pearl has reappeared and seems upset. ha- like I brought the cat in!

drive.
pick up hubs
drive.
come home.
Telling hubs the story as we are entering the building. I look around and I don't see the cat...must be someone's cat. I looked in the laundry room...nope, no cat.
Hubs opens door...Pearl is running from the living room to the bedroom. Hubs walks in first. Stops on his tracks and says with freaky ghost movie voice: "its baaaacccck"

SERIOUSLY?!!!! WTF,WTF,WTF!!!!

I go to the bedroom while hubs tries to figure it out how Houdini got in (oh yeah, I name it)

he yells: PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA


me: yes?


hubs: come heeeeere....


me: what?


hubs: he is entering from behind the stove


me: what? You're crazy


I looked and see this skinny mini is indeed coming out from behind the stove.
we pulled the stove out and on the corner behind the cabinets there is a hole in the wall.

For the next hour we chase, grab, lost, spray, put food, push, grab more, move furniture, put back furniture, trying to catch Houdini. Pearl was freaking out, she is like a bitter old lady criticizing the young generations for dressing like a ho. She is hissing and making grunt noises. All in good fun. BTW- the little guy is laughing thinking we are playing some fun musical furniture game. I finally cave in and grabbed a box of diapers, empty it out, place cat food in it and catch the little fellow (with pink gloves on of course 'cause I'm a stylish mama)

UFFF

Hubs place a cardboard on the hole and tape it shut in the mean time.

Now I have to call CS again to let them know that the crazy fat white and black animal is ok, because it would not be funny if they come and let Pearl out thinking she was the intruder.

Over & out

P.S
My oldest is dating...a girl name Patricia :)
Oh, and I have to tell you why I love craiglist