Friday, April 29, 2011

Some friends are better left in the past

This post was going to be written at a later time, with a clearer head. Sadly I was on the phone with a "friend" and I got so angry I needed to vent, so here I am: sad and broken hearted.

I am going to start with my first issue, my dear best friend of over 15 years and I may be broking up {if there is such a thing}. We became friends back in college, when we where both 20. We clicked immediately, she was my soul-mate, my best friend, and more like a sister to me. We went thru dating jerks, getting dumped, being single, the dating, the ugly, the finally getting married, and having kids.

When she was having issues with her husband, she even contemplated moving here with me. That's how close we where. But then things changed, her calls and emails where not as often. She would claim not to get my messages (even when her voice was the one on the machine). She always claim she loves me the same, she is just a little busy. Then a few years back it started that when I went back home she didn't have time to see me, and it made me feel awful. She didn't go to my wedding claiming low funds (we had a beach wedding-which was only 1 hr away from her) but then went to a resort about a month later, and yet I let it go.

I can understand than having 4 kids takes a lot, but each time I called her she was out with her new friends, kids where at the daycare or with the I didn't understand she had time to go shopping but not to stop by and see me. Last year even when I called and asked her when would she be home so I could come by, she always had something to I got the hint and stopped asking her to meet.

This year I tried to keep the calls (because we did talk more when she had surgery) but then again she didnt make an effort, even her FB messages where short...but again always telling me she love me and missed me. I told her that I didn't feel that since I tried making a effort leaving her messages and she never responded. She just replied with a joke.

After all this I've decided not to invest my feelings on our former friendship anymore. i would go back home and will not tell her I'm there. I will no longer call or email her, or even send her a FB message. I'm tired of feeling hurt and rejected by my former best friend. It hurts so much because she was so meaningful in my life for so long. I know she has new friends around (mostly friends of the Husband) a lot of people that drink and smoke and gamble, which are things she now does with her husband...things I don't do or enjoy. I guess we have grown apart and these things happen, but I never thought it would happen to us...

I wont make a fuss about it, I don't think she sees this is done or maybe she doesn't even care. I will just let this fade slowly and no longer try to perform CPR to a relationship that is already on cardiac arrest.

Then tonight, another old friend asked me to call her- she is also back home. I called her even though it was late because she was so depressed in our last few calls, having issues in her business and with her boyfriend. As it happens my son's Godmother is also back home getting several plastic surgeries done -back, lipo, stomach, breast, arms. I talk to her for a while, asking her how she was doing, etc. Then she put my friend that requested I called her on the phone. She was making fun of the one that had the surgery calling her a cow. I replied that she did not look like a cow, plus she had a baby 8 months ago.

Then she say to me: "You should come here and do Plastic Surgery too, I don't even recognize you. You need to keep it up for your husband, You and Jessie let yourselves go"
First I laugh and replied " are you paying for it" to which she reply I had a husband. I said yes, a husband who is the only one that works, with two kids of which one is going to college.

She continue her belligerence on me by saying that she KNOWS my husband loves me but I need to have this for him.

I wanted to say that yes I was fat but happily married, and she was thin and still haven't found one guy that wants to marry her...I wanted to, but that would make me be like her- mean and shallow, This is not the first time she makes these kind of commentsand she knows I don't appreciated them, and honestly, I felt sorry because I knew how misserable she was in her own life, so I let it go. I really hate confrontations (unbelievable- I know) so my take is just to be away from people like that, move on and be happy and healthy for ME...after all, some "friends" are better left in the past.

Over & out

Thursday, April 28, 2011

A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.

We are back with another little titbit on beauty. and to think I was the girl in high school who only wore eyeliner and refused to paint her nails...boy do I have come a long way =)
I got my second Birchbox and was even happier with my new items.

it came with deluxe samples of:

Juice Beauty Green Apple Peel Full Strength
Weleda Wild Rose Smoothing Facial Lotion
LIV GRN C2C Fragrance Collection Earth Eau De Parfum
Juice Beauty Stem Cellular Repair Eye Treatment
Zoya Intimate Spring 2011 Nail Polish Collection

I've haven't use it all yet though. In the meantime, I had decided to lighten my beauty routine so now I am using this cleaner Neutrogena Naturals Pore Scrub,

then I use the apple peel that came in the Birchbox, followed by moisturizer. I'm liking it so far. I don't use the peel everyday, but it even works for my Hubs_ I decided to give him a spa day last Sunday and he was loving it. I also got this pore minimizer, which works wonders:

clinique pore minimizer instant perfector ($18 as opposed to the serum which is $30+) and would be saving to get this next
origins vitazing

I will use the above instead of a base since I don't need that much coverage, plus this is SPF and is tinted. The reviews state is wonderful so we will see. Finally, last week I finally got a chance to get a Mani done, a glittery french, I wanted to show you my new color but the camera sucks...not sure what I'm doing wrong...but here it is: Zoya Faye

Zoya is NOT one of my favorite brands, just because of their service, but the colors are nice...and they are vegan if you are into that kind of thing.
Today has been a quiet day, but I was so thrilled that I finally found a learning center that I can take the little guy, so excited to do this! Even though I'm home I would like for him to interact with more kids his age and this place offers education to prep him for kindergarten.

I'm also setting up for his 2nd birthday and I cannot wait! Happy Thursday

Over & out

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

It's a Beautiful day

I finally got a break. Aiden decided he wanted to sit in his high chair while watching cartoons so, is now or never for me. Lately he wants me to sit with him to watch the cartoons, play dinosaurs, etc. hence my lack for much of a domestic life, or a life at all outside of "To infinity, and beyoooooond"

See? Bunny face here can make me do anything he wants.

Is a beautiful day, finally warm, and a perfect day to share these thoughts that have been wondering my mind.

I've been meaning to talk about this for a while but I don't even know where to start. I try really hard to teach my kids that being mean is not ok at all, but them I have to admit I allow for this behavior around me more than I should. I think Kathy Griffin is hilarious but in reality, she is mean to others and makes fun of them. Am I wrong for laughing with her? because I don't know these people? does it make it ok?

I saw the other day that two girls proceeded to beat up another girl in a McDonalds and NO ONE did anything to stop them. I'm sorry, I digress: ONE ELDERLY WOMAN was the only one who actually try to intervene, every other person just watch or tape the incident. This is disgusting.

When did we become so immune to cruelty that we no longer care? I remember last summer we where driving out of our complex and we saw two kids fighting and a circle had formed around it. I promptly told the hubs to stop the car and I yelled from the top of my lungs, with my most heavy accent: "STOP THEM RIGHT NOW, I'M CALLING THE POLICE"

One girl replied "is just them two fightin
g" , like that was supposed to make it ok. I replied by saying that they cannot, and should not, just stand there and just watch. The fight stopped and they went home. Leave it to me, an immigrant woman, to become the neighbor watch.

I see this happening all the time. People don't want to get involve. Is like when I watch "what would you do?" and see that some people will do nothing in front on injustice; but thankfully a few would stand up for it, no matter what.

How about the growing hate mail, post, messages on the net? is appalling the things I read all the time. From telling a pregnant mother that they hope she and the baby die in labor, to how ugly is someone's face, to religious insults. When would this stop? are we really telling our kids is ok to make fun of others? I think in a way, subconsciously, we are.

I'm not perfect {shhhh, don't tell anyone} and I admit to laugh at those jokes too. But I first realize that something was off when I was reading one of my favorite bloggers dish out on Celebrities during the whole award month. Now, not liking someone's dress is perfectly ok, but some of her comments where so mean, she bashed out of kids, pregnancy, moral issues and it was so shocking I had to say something.

Her next review post said something like this "If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit next to me" and so many people agreed with her. I only responded by saying "I believe that was directed to me" which she said she was just giving a warning. I guess now is ok and acceptable to be mean. We don't think for a second "this is someone's daughter, mother, Sister, wife, brother, father, etc". I didn't say much after that but I wanted to say how would you feel about someone making those remarks about your daughter, a daughter that has overcome so many disabilities. But then I realized THAT would be mean too, and I don't think it would change anything.

I don't try to say that I'm better, just that sometimes we have to really look at the situation and think, is this really going to be funny or cruel? am I just as bad as the others or could I do something different?

My oldest say that I want to believe in the good all the time, trying to help people and I say I do. If I can help someone, I will. I want to believe that people are generally good. I'm not prefect, but I'm trying to be better. To show by example that even though it may not always seem so, doing good and kind is always the better choice.
If you have a moment, please watch this video.

How about it? Let's do better today. Off from my soap box-again =)

Over & out

Monday, April 25, 2011

Friend Making Monday: The Easter edition

I know it says Easter but it should be Thanksgiving because I was stuffed like a Turkey :) UGH, even now I type this while finishing a little bit more of my famous Potato Salad- is true, I do make the best.

This weekend felt so nice to me, but I'm so glad a new week is coming. I want to get back to doing my exercise and writing down what I eat, I felt those two little things where really good for me. So without further ado:

If you've taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you're new, please take a moment to answer this week's question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section of this Kenz post @ All the weigh so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it's time for this week's topic!

FMM: Today I....

Today I felt...loved, happy and looking forward to a new week!

Today I saw....
strange people wearing strange things at the Supermarket...seriously

Today I ate...
a lot. Pineapple glazed Ham, potato salad, sweet potato casserole...etc, yummo

Today I kissed...
everyone: my baby nephew, my Goddaughter, my kids, my Sis, the Hubs and even the cat

Today I bought...potatoes, mayo, Self magazine and a newspaper; I bought a book yesterday online which is a little bit more interesting.

Today I heard...
Aiden saying to a cartoon "oh no, don't cry".

Today I lost...
nothing, thank gawd. It would have been nice to say a pound though :)

Today I decided...
that this week is going to be better than last and I'm going to back to be the better me I want to be.

Today I need...
to really figure out which moisturizer I'm gonna buy.

Today I wish...
I could get on a plane and go home to see my Dad.

As I cuddle yesterday in our couch while the rain was falling outside, Aiden grabs a blanket and cover us both so we can see a movie makes me feel loved and happy. It makes me feel like I have already so much. Life is good. =)

Hope that yours is too and that this new week brings something new and amazing, even if small, to your life.

Over & out

Friday, April 22, 2011

I'm alive...I think

YES, I'm back. I wish I could tell you something extraordinary happened in my live that prevent me from posting, or that I went on a fabulous vacation and didn't want to announce it just in case psycho-white-van driver that followed me the other day reads this blog. But no, it was something more mundane: the net was temporarily disconnected and our phone is also VOIP, and it's connected to that. Fun couple of days, huh?

See these things happen sometimes and is all well with me as long as the house, the car, food and the college get paid.
So we are back in business, with a minor glitch. Josephine (our pc) is tired and dying. We knew this was coming and she got a good life (10 yrs) so you see, it will happen soon that Josephine will get replaced. I wish I can say that I'm sad since I usually get extremely attached to inanimate objects (remember the IKEA commercial with the little lamp that got replaced and left at the curve? yeah, I fell awful about it) but it needs to happen.

Hubs turned 37 and he took it very well, I made his favorite meal and dessert (Lasagna and Flan-which we call quesillo). I suggested we go out to dinner but due to the Easter week we don't eat meat so he said he rather go when is over. And on that topic I have to say it AMAZES me how different people in the US celebrate Easter. I'm not going to talk about religion because it drives me bunkers, but just a bit about what we do.

Holy week (which is what we called it) is basically an entire week off from work and school. Most businesses are closed after Wednesday; on Friday we had to visit 7 churches. Good Friday we where supposed to be in mourning, so no horse play, no loud music or TV. Sunday
of course we had to go to church. It seems to me here Earth day is seriously more important. Shocking to me, even though I care for the earth I think we are loosing a tad bit of focus.

Crossing over to mother Earth, I've noticed we use a ridiculous amount of paper towels {and by "we" I mean my 18 yr old...don't get me started with soap and toilet paper...the boy has issues}, so I purchased cloth towels to do some of the clean up around the house (white or course, so I can toss them in the laundry with clorox). Hope that helps out a bit. Also I've been researching the Brita filters and is clear to me we should get one (the ones that go in the faucet drive me loco).

Uhm, what else? oh yeah, Hubs got me a present -even though it was his birthday, 'cause that's the kind of guy he is- and I was so shocked.

I's the book by Sting, with all his lyrics and the meaning behind the songs!!!! I love STING and seeing him in concert was a fantastic. I've been a HUGE fan since I was about 10 and my Sister introduce me to the "tape" Dream of the Blue Turtles.

Also this little guy is turning TWO next month:

The photo above is from when he was almost 3 months...time does fly. Now he tell us "hey guys" when we get home, or say things like "I'm OK", "whatchadoing mommy", helluuu gatuuuu- Hello cat- with an English accent mind you. We are planning on a small family gathering in NYC with a Monkey theme. I'm so excited to go, my SIL is pregnant and we haven't seen her since the holidays.

On the job hunting front, nothing has happen. I decided to keep looking an in the meantime trying to find places where I can take the little guy to interact with more kiddos, so will see how that goes. OK, I think that's enough for now. I will be back...I promise. Unless Josephine goes into cardiac arrest.

Over & Out
P.S- have you seen the show "What would you do?" fascinating!

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Friend Making monday 04-12-11

Ugh, I can believe I'm doing so bad at blogging. I promise to do better. In the mean time, please join Kenz @ Alltheweigh with this week's post :)

FMM: Everyday Things

1) What is your favorite part of an average day? actually different things: my morning coffee, going for a walk now that is warmer, the afternoon glow on my window while I'm cooking, the night time when I take my little guy from the bath and he cuddles with me...

2) Is there one food that you eat every single day? If so, what is it?
Sadly is a drink: coffee, I wish it was something better or healthier...I do drink much more water these days too.

3) Are you an early bird, or do you prefer to sleep in late? There is not enough coffee in Colombia to make me a morning person. Having kids sleeping late must days is not an option, but we get to sleep later on the weekends.

4) Share one thing that you're looking forward to doing this week. Is my Hubs Birthday this week and I'm planning a special dinner :)

5) What's for dinner this evening? ugh, a disaster. I tried making Chicken Florentine and while I was cooking my oldest came and told me the bathroom sink was flooded...almost burn the entire thing and looked disgusting.

Looking forward to yet another college appointment tomorrow. Today was so beautiful, but tomorrow...I'll have my rainy day!

Over & out

Friday, April 8, 2011

Because already there is so much...

I have a list of things I want to blog about, is just that there is already so much going on in the world. I've always felt that being Debby downer and always complaining is a sure way to have people walk away from you. Venting one day, ok. Having a sad, negative post all the time...uh, no.

I have received my darn polishes from Zoya and I like them, I just hate that freaking company. I look forward to a much needed relaxed afternoon of manicures.

Above: Tamsen source
The Hubs is having one of his final test on Monday- a sleep study, so hopefully we can start working on getting him better. I've also mentioned that I went on Interviews *sigh* let's see what happens.

In all Honesty I am NOT looking forward to going back to work. I know most people will think I should, from the financial aspects and benefits. Is just that I feel like this is where I should be, helping one kid go to college and raising my little guy. Now that spring is here and I'm looking forward to enjoying my time with them outside. Not all is money...sadly the cable, electricity and car loan don't seem to have the same mindset :)

Right now I can't help to have my mind wrapped up in the Government...the USA Government- that may be shutting down for a bit. That's scary, even for me coming from a 3rd World Country. And sad.

Ok enough of that, I will come back with a better blog...soon. And I got to tell y'all that after 13 yrs of NOT watching Soap Operas one has me HOOKED! (is a Spanish one though)

Over & out

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Friend Making Mondays...ON A TUESDAY

So I'm going to be late to one of my favorite blog post. The last couple of days have been filled with getting stuff done in the house, filing paperwork for school, job hunting and more medical appoinments. I often wonder why when you go for a job interview they ask you so many ridiculous questions. As if you are going to say: "yeah, Hannibal Lecter is my role model" UGH...and "where do you see yourself in 5 yrs?" Seriously!? I have no clue!!!! How the hell should I know.

But back to this week's post:

FMM: Describe Your Dream Mate

I like many other girls, been dreaming since I was 14 of what my dream guy would look like. The Truth be told, Disney kind of messed with our heads as we where growing up :). well, Disney and all the other frogs I had to kiss along the way.

My dream guy is a man's man. A guy that like sports-baseball, football, etc-but is ok if I don't like them. Who is interested enough to learn a little (or in his case a lot) about politics and world issues but respects others different views.

A guy knows how to be a guy, a little rough, not a pretty boy at all. A guy that knows that a little shadow on his bear can look really sexy. A guy who uses soap and not my body wash, but will indulge me when I want to give him a spa day and suggest giving him a facial. A guy that when I'm walking hand in hand will represent me, that has a presence without being cocky. A guy who is confident in his own skin and does not pretend to be some one else for show. A guy who is kind to others, who will get out of his way to help people. A guy who would give his seat to someone else, and not just the pretty girls. A guy that will open the door for me, and not just on the first couple of dates.

A guy that would listen to me while I complain yet again about my mother being crazy, or that crazy coworker. A guy who understand I need my girl time and will be happy to take care of the house/kids so I can have that time. A confident guy who not only is ok but encourages me to have my own ideas and believes, agreeing in some and respecting me when we don't.

A guy that is man enough to rent "Bride Wars" on his own because HE wanted to see it, or cry watching "Marley & Me" A guy who is also a huge fan of WWE but understand that I will not sit and watch it with him very Monday. A guy that would spent a day watching reruns of MONK and ordering food, and think that was the best day ever.

The one who would show up with my favorite chocolate or Ice cream, just because. A gyy that will always show me I'm his number one girl and wont act up just to show off in front of the guys. a guy Who would hold my hair up while I'm sick and clean my face and the mess afterwards.
A guy who knows that I love makeup and nail polish and would wait patiently while I go crazy over a MAC store.

My dream guy would be my best friend, a guy I can tell him my past, my dreams, my hopes. A guy who is honest, who would call when he says he would, who would make it work no matter how far you are. A guy that after years have passed, sees you in a new outfit and tells me "You look Beautiful" and by the light in his eyes I'll know he means it.

A guy who dances and would not mind getting silly on the floor with me. A guy that would do his best to be a great dad to our kids, who would also not try to be my son's father, but rather his best friend.

My dream guy is a big guy who does laundry, doesn't mind helping around the house and following my neurotic instructions because he knows I'm OCD and he loves me like that. He would work hard in our relationship and make me feel loved and wanted.

My dream guy made me the happiest girl alive when he asked me to marry him.

Now is your turn! go over to All the Weigh and tell us about it.

Over & Out