I will Survive

First I was afraid / I was petrified / Kept thinking I could never live / without you by my side ... Sing it Gloria!

You bet your a$$ that's my song for the day. Oh, how I wish I had it in my Ipod so I can blast it. Thank Gawd I am writing today, because if it was yesterday you would have gotten and entirely different post from me.

Am I OK?

No, I'm not ok. Yesterday was an awful day for me (us). But like everything in life there is a lesson to be learned. Mine was that some people SUCK. That right now I should worry about my OWN family (Vin and the kids) and nothing / no one else.

I taught me that Miracles DO happen and that someone really, really likes us up there in heaven. It taught me that friends can be EVEN MORE than I ever though, people like you, who are concern about us when some don't even care what happens to us. THANK YOU for caring. You don't know how much this means to me.

I learned that there is a reason for everything, even when a dark cloud is hovering over your head and that love and hope is ALL.YOU.NEED. Pardon my French but SCREW everything and everyone else!

Do I seem angry? I Freaking am!

But more than anything I'm hurt. Hurt like I always get when I get disappointed. People that meant so much for me and I mean so little to them; no matter how much I was and have been there for them. Sad to see that the world is not always the great place I want my kids to grow in it.

But I am also glad. Glad for the opportunity to grow. Glad that I have some FREAKING AMAZING PEOPLE around me. Glad that it gave me an opportunity to teach another lesson to my kid (oldest, since the Little guy doesn't care about much unless is on Nick Jr.)

Oldest kid looked at me with his big dark eyes, hugged me so hard and told me everything WILL BE ALRIGHT. I told him I want him to be the BEST person he can be, and when someone is in need he MUST help if he can. If he becomes a Pediatrician I want him to be always eager to assist no matter if they can pay or not. I want him to keep a kind heart and an open, giving hand. I also told him to save, because unfortunately people don't think much of you if you don't have much.

Sad, but true.

I am stronger than I though. I am a darn amazing person and people do love me. They love me for ME!!!! =) It doesn't matter if a "few" people think less of me (or us) for our current condition. Is like the saying goes:"...Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind" Thanks Dr. Seuss.

If you think less of me because you think I am worth what I own, then you really don't belong in my life. If you measure your love for me according to what I own, what I can do/ give you...then you are a miserable person who WILL be measure in the same way that you measure others. And maybe you already are...and maybe that's why life is a BITCH and what goes around comes around.

But for me, there is a HUGE light shinning bright my path. There is a huge blessing in me and in my family. There is love. Unconditional, uncanny, amazing love. And for that I'm glad because WE can conquer the world, and we will! And boy...are you gonna be sorry you where not on my side! Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha (evil laugh while rubbing hands together)

Over & Out